You’re Probably More Afraid Than You Realize—And That’s Human

My guess is that many of you don’t actually realize how afraid you are. While the brain takes in 10 million bits of information per second, we can only consciously process about 50. It wouldn’t be sustainable to be aware of our fear at all times—but that doesn’t mean the mind and body aren’t constantly scanning for danger (and finding it).

Of course, most of us—at least those reading a blog on the internet—aren’t chronically in danger. But that doesn’t mean the body isn’t interpreting the data as a threat. Evolution is slow, taking millions of years. Our nervous systems weren’t built for the hyperstimulating, fast-paced modern world. (More on this in later newsletters.)

Organisms are actually built to handle short-term stress and even benefit from the right dose (a concept called *hormesis*). But chronic stress? According to the American Psychological Association and the American Institute of Stress, it impacts over three-quarters of the U.S. population.

This complex world takes a toll on all of us, leading to nervous system responses we often confuse for personality traits.

When we hear fight, flight, freeze, or fawn—the classic nervous system defenses—we tend to think of extreme behaviors. But they often show up in subtle ways:

**FIGHT** – Interrupting, talking over others, or feeling spikes of judgment and irritation

**FLIGHT** – Staying overly busy, doom-scrolling, or “taking the edge off” with alcohol

**FREEZE** – Delaying responses to texts, struggling to make simple decisions

**FAWN** – Minimizing your needs, saying yes when you mean no, overexplaining
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These default responses are deeply wired, shaped by our history, and often unconscious.

And unfortunately, you can’t just think your way out of them—believe me, I tried.

Until we address our scared bodies, all the insight in the world won’t create real change.